Harrison Haynes claimed to have met a stranger online while playing a video game when he was twelve years old and a middle school student.
Haynes claims that during the course of the following few months, the man, who identified himself as 19 but whom Haynes had never met in person, grew to be his “best friend.”
“I’m not making friends, so this gaming space was like a really good space for solace for me,” Haynes, now a 20-year-old college student, told “Good Morning America.”
He said he only knew the “teenager” as a fellow video game enthusiast, but they were pals, and he said, “We had so much fun.”
Haynes as a child
Haynes claimed that as their virtual connection grew, the “teenager” requested him to switch from using video game applications for communication to texting.
After that, Haynes claimed the “teenager” alienated him from his own family, exposed him to pornography, and caused him to self-harm over the course of the following year.
Haynes now stated that he is telling his tale to raise awareness among other children and their parents of the possible risks associated with technology, including social media, texting, and telephones.
“I think for almost every generation in America right now, everyone was told that there’s going to be a stranger in a white van handing you candy, and you should say no to that stranger,” Haynes said. “But I think for us and for my generation, the danger isn’t the stranger in the white van. That’s not where the call is coming from. The call is coming from inside our pockets. It’s coming from inside our iPhones.”
When Haynes encountered the “19-year-old” who would later sexually groom him, he claims to have been a 12-year-old who was having trouble making friends at school.
“In so many ways, his relationship with me, our friendship, it started so slow that it didn’t feel like I was talking to a stranger. It felt like I was talking to a mentor, like a brother,” Haynes said. “I definitely connected with him better than I did with my peers at school, because for every time I got bullied, he was there to support me.”
Haynes claims that after exchanging messages on gaming platforms, he and the “teenager” became friends and switched to iMessage, an instant messaging app created by Apple. Haynes claimed to have had talks on that platform—which he used to access on an iPod and then an iPhone—that went beyond simple gaming and into more sinister areas.
“Now I was getting more messages at school,” Haynes said. “He slowly started exposing me to content like self-harm and images and videos of online pornographic content as a 12-year-old, my first time being exposed to porn.”
Haynes claimed that when he was at school, participating in extracurricular activities, and having meals with his family, the “teenager” would text him with messages about self-harm and pornography. Haynes claimed to have witnessed a change in the “19-year-old’s” personality during that period, as they began messaging him four or five times a day as opposed to the two or three times a week they had been exchanging messages. Haynes claimed that after being exposed to porn and self-harm, he started engaging with the material on his own. He further stated that he concealed his friendship with the “teenager” from all those in his social circle.
“When things started to go south with our friendship, and he started exposing me to pictures and videos of self-harm and internet pornography, I didn’t think I could reach out to an adult anymore,” Haynes said. “Part of the issue was the taboo and the stigmatization of all of that. I didn’t feel like I could reach out to a principal or a counselor or a teacher or my parents, because I felt like I was going to get in trouble.”
Haynes said that as time went on, he felt like he was “trapped against a wall” in his conversations with the “19-year-old.”
“It was someone that I really did deeply care for, and I knew that if I had reached out for help, that potentially would put him in danger,” he said. “There was this weird back and forth … in my head, like, I want to get out for myself, because now I’m self-harming and now I’m consuming pornography as a 12,13-year-old boy.”
Haynes claimed that after more than a year of correspondence with the “teenager,” his parents saw him using his cellphone in his bed at night. As part of the guidelines around his usage, Haynes claimed at the time that he had developed the habit of getting his phone from the downstairs of his house, where he claimed his parents kept it hidden every night. That evening, Haynes claimed to have been in contact with the “teenager,” who he claimed was making suicide threats.
“I cried so loud that I woke up my parents down the hall,” Haynes said, adding that his parents then went through his phone and discovered his messages with the “teenager.”
“They told me that they saw everything, and they didn’t seem upset. They didn’t seem mad at me like I thought they would,” Haynes recalled. “They sat me down and told me I was being manipulated in some sort of way. I don’t think anyone in our world had the language yet for grooming. I don’t think we knew that yet.”
According to Haynes, he and his parents told his school resource officer about what had happened, and the officer assisted them in reporting it to the authorities.
“GMA” received confirmation from a Hanover County Sheriff’s Office representative that a police report had been submitted in Haynes’ case. The spokeswoman stated that “due to a lack of evidence and limited cooperation from the family,” the case could not be prosecuted.
“We always encourage parents to be proactive and check their children’s devices regularly. Often times we find that kids use very innocent apps to maintain communication with offenders,” the spokesperson said. “Anything that allows children to communicate or send messages can be used in an inappropriate way and allow a gateway for offenders to reach children in otherwise safe environments.”
Haynes claimed he stopped talking to the “teenager” as soon as his parents found out what was going on and started to recover from what he claimed had happened.
He claimed that cutting back on technology and social media, which included using a flip phone for almost two years and abstaining from all social media apps, was a necessary step in his rehabilitation.
When he grew older, Haynes claimed he was able to reflect on his experiences and recognize them as an instance of online grooming, which is defined as the process by which a predator connects with a minor online by “offering support and attention to gain their trust,” as stated by the U.S. Department of Homeland Security.
At home, Haynes said he would encourage parents to have open and honest conversations with their kids about everything from online safety to topics they may be exposed to online like sexuality, pornography and self-harm.
“Parents, I cannot emphasize this enough, do not be afraid to talk to your kids about uncomfortable things,” Haynes said. “If I’d had that conversation with my parents, I wouldn’t have needed to find solace in an online stranger.”
He continued, “If parents can engage with their own kids in the space that makes them feel comfortable, in their own homes, where they’re safe, I think we can have a much better future.”
To help others, Haynes has become a volunteer with Wired Human, a nonprofit organization that works to make the internet safer for kids. The organization recommends parents and caregivers follow the “Rumb Model” to protect kids online, with relationships, understanding, mentorship and boundaries as the key tenets.
Harrison Haynes is pictured at a protest at Apple headquarters in Cupertino, California, on June 10, 2024 calling on the tech giant to implement more measures to protect kids’ safety in its products.
Harrison Haynes explains how he was groomed online by a stranger, alienated from his own family, exposed to pornography, and caused him to self-harm
Harrison Haynes claimed to have met a stranger online while playing a video game when he was twelve years old and a middle school student.
Haynes claims that during the course of the following few months, the man, who identified himself as 19 but whom Haynes had never met in person, grew to be his “best friend.”
“I’m not making friends, so this gaming space was like a really good space for solace for me,” Haynes, now a 20-year-old college student, told “Good Morning America.”
He said he only knew the “teenager” as a fellow video game enthusiast, but they were pals, and he said, “We had so much fun.”
Haynes claimed that as their virtual connection grew, the “teenager” requested him to switch from using video game applications for communication to texting.
After that, Haynes claimed the “teenager” alienated him from his own family, exposed him to pornography, and caused him to self-harm over the course of the following year.
Haynes now stated that he is telling his tale to raise awareness among other children and their parents of the possible risks associated with technology, including social media, texting, and telephones.
“I think for almost every generation in America right now, everyone was told that there’s going to be a stranger in a white van handing you candy, and you should say no to that stranger,” Haynes said. “But I think for us and for my generation, the danger isn’t the stranger in the white van. That’s not where the call is coming from. The call is coming from inside our pockets. It’s coming from inside our iPhones.”
When Haynes encountered the “19-year-old” who would later sexually groom him, he claims to have been a 12-year-old who was having trouble making friends at school.
“In so many ways, his relationship with me, our friendship, it started so slow that it didn’t feel like I was talking to a stranger. It felt like I was talking to a mentor, like a brother,” Haynes said. “I definitely connected with him better than I did with my peers at school, because for every time I got bullied, he was there to support me.”
Haynes claims that after exchanging messages on gaming platforms, he and the “teenager” became friends and switched to iMessage, an instant messaging app created by Apple. Haynes claimed to have had talks on that platform—which he used to access on an iPod and then an iPhone—that went beyond simple gaming and into more sinister areas.
“Now I was getting more messages at school,” Haynes said. “He slowly started exposing me to content like self-harm and images and videos of online pornographic content as a 12-year-old, my first time being exposed to porn.”
Haynes claimed that when he was at school, participating in extracurricular activities, and having meals with his family, the “teenager” would text him with messages about self-harm and pornography. Haynes claimed to have witnessed a change in the “19-year-old’s” personality during that period, as they began messaging him four or five times a day as opposed to the two or three times a week they had been exchanging messages. Haynes claimed that after being exposed to porn and self-harm, he started engaging with the material on his own. He further stated that he concealed his friendship with the “teenager” from all those in his social circle.
“When things started to go south with our friendship, and he started exposing me to pictures and videos of self-harm and internet pornography, I didn’t think I could reach out to an adult anymore,” Haynes said. “Part of the issue was the taboo and the stigmatization of all of that. I didn’t feel like I could reach out to a principal or a counselor or a teacher or my parents, because I felt like I was going to get in trouble.”
Haynes said that as time went on, he felt like he was “trapped against a wall” in his conversations with the “19-year-old.”
“It was someone that I really did deeply care for, and I knew that if I had reached out for help, that potentially would put him in danger,” he said. “There was this weird back and forth … in my head, like, I want to get out for myself, because now I’m self-harming and now I’m consuming pornography as a 12,13-year-old boy.”
Haynes claimed that after more than a year of correspondence with the “teenager,” his parents saw him using his cellphone in his bed at night. As part of the guidelines around his usage, Haynes claimed at the time that he had developed the habit of getting his phone from the downstairs of his house, where he claimed his parents kept it hidden every night. That evening, Haynes claimed to have been in contact with the “teenager,” who he claimed was making suicide threats.
“I cried so loud that I woke up my parents down the hall,” Haynes said, adding that his parents then went through his phone and discovered his messages with the “teenager.”
“They told me that they saw everything, and they didn’t seem upset. They didn’t seem mad at me like I thought they would,” Haynes recalled. “They sat me down and told me I was being manipulated in some sort of way. I don’t think anyone in our world had the language yet for grooming. I don’t think we knew that yet.”
According to Haynes, he and his parents told his school resource officer about what had happened, and the officer assisted them in reporting it to the authorities.
“GMA” received confirmation from a Hanover County Sheriff’s Office representative that a police report had been submitted in Haynes’ case. The spokeswoman stated that “due to a lack of evidence and limited cooperation from the family,” the case could not be prosecuted.
“We always encourage parents to be proactive and check their children’s devices regularly. Often times we find that kids use very innocent apps to maintain communication with offenders,” the spokesperson said. “Anything that allows children to communicate or send messages can be used in an inappropriate way and allow a gateway for offenders to reach children in otherwise safe environments.”
Haynes claimed he stopped talking to the “teenager” as soon as his parents found out what was going on and started to recover from what he claimed had happened.
He claimed that cutting back on technology and social media, which included using a flip phone for almost two years and abstaining from all social media apps, was a necessary step in his rehabilitation.
When he grew older, Haynes claimed he was able to reflect on his experiences and recognize them as an instance of online grooming, which is defined as the process by which a predator connects with a minor online by “offering support and attention to gain their trust,” as stated by the U.S. Department of Homeland Security.
At home, Haynes said he would encourage parents to have open and honest conversations with their kids about everything from online safety to topics they may be exposed to online like sexuality, pornography and self-harm.
“Parents, I cannot emphasize this enough, do not be afraid to talk to your kids about uncomfortable things,” Haynes said. “If I’d had that conversation with my parents, I wouldn’t have needed to find solace in an online stranger.”
He continued, “If parents can engage with their own kids in the space that makes them feel comfortable, in their own homes, where they’re safe, I think we can have a much better future.”
To help others, Haynes has become a volunteer with Wired Human, a nonprofit organization that works to make the internet safer for kids. The organization recommends parents and caregivers follow the “Rumb Model” to protect kids online, with relationships, understanding, mentorship and boundaries as the key tenets.